As I was driving through the picturesque Coromandel, simply going about my workday, I stumbled upon a breathtaking spot that left me completely awestruck.

The vista of the islands, the sun’s gentle shimmer on the water – it was a sight to behold.

What happened next was beyond words.

A rush of pure beauty, joy, and gratitude bubbled up from deep within my heart space and surged through my whole body. I was immersed in a sensation so pure it was overwhelming but in the best way.

Tears of happiness streamed down my face, and it felt like my entire being had experienced an orgasm of pure bliss and thankfulness.

As the surges subsided and the tears slowed I was left feeling a buzz of elation, and a feeling as though my emotional space had been cleansed.

I thought to myself “holy shit, I think I just had a joygasm”

And there the term was coined.

This profound experience made me realise something:

I was able to have these Joygasms because I had managed to overcome overthinking, learned how to manage overwhelm and stress, and regulate my nervous system. 

When your nervous system is dysregulated, you’re stuck in your head, lost in a swirl of overthinking – that’s when joy and gratitude elude you.

“I get it, I’ve been there.

Overthinking can be a real pain. It’s like this never-ending loop of imagining the worst possible outcomes because your system’s got this obsession with avoiding disappointment, judgement, and rejection.

And it’s not just the endless what-ifs; it’s that ‘analysis paralysis’ that sets in, making simple decisions feel impossible to make. 

This cycle often leads to missed opportunities and a whole lot of self-blame.

What’s even more disheartening is that it robs you of the ability to experience joy. When you’re stuck in your head, overthinking every aspect of life, those moments of pure happiness become as rare as unicorns.

When you’re in a regulated state however, you become ready to receive, connect with the world, and approach life with a sense of eager excitement.

This is the biggest takeaway I have for you:

In a dysregulated nervous system there is no ability to experience joy, happiness, gratitude, peace, relaxation, contentment or any other resource states.

Why?

Because your body and mind are in survival mode. Its highest priority is getting you out of imminent danger, your system is closed to receiving and hyper focused on safety. 

Think of it like this:

You and a friend are sprinting away from a charging tiger along a narrow path.

Suddenly, your friend halts and starts marvelling at a beautiful flower growing by the side of the path, exclaiming, “Look at how exquisite its beauty is!”

In that tense moment, you’d probably be bewildered by their reaction, thinking they’ve gone completely bonkers, and you’d urgently encourage them to keep running with you because there’s a tiger hot on your heels.

This is what is happening to your system when you’re in fight or flight.

These days, the tiger is represented by our workload, relationship stress, our own high expectations, and self-criticism keeping us on high alert.

When you try to access joy or notice that at a time you could be feeling joy you instead just feel anxiety, it’s because your system is essentially saying – “there’s no time to stop and smell the flowers – you must keep running”. 

Imagine if things could be like this:

You now start your day with a moment of mindfulness instead of reaching for your phone.

You savour the stillness because your system is at ease allowing you to set positive intentions for the hours ahead. Starting your work day like this means you are ready and eager to take on the day and your task list. 

At lunch time you head out on your break, you’re strolling through the CBD that’s lost in the daily grind, when suddenly you stumble upon a small, hidden park tucked away between towering skyscrapers.

The air is filled with the scent of blooming flowers, and a gentle breeze carries the soothing sounds of a nearby fountain.

As you enter the park, you come across a tranquil pond reflecting the sunlight, surrounded by vibrant greenery. It’s a scene of unexpected natural beauty in the heart of the urban jungle.

At that moment, a surge of pure awe, joy, and gratitude washes over you.

It bubbles up from deep within your heart space, a feeling of bliss so powerful that you feel like you have tapped directly into the soul of the universe.

Your whole being experiencing a joygasm of immense bliss and thankfulness.

You reflect on the fruits of your labour, you took the journey of empowering yourself to learn how to regulate your nervous system and the pay off is coming through in ways you could never have even imagined. 

You feel so plugged in, so connected, so alive and so much more grateful than you have ever been.

This could be you my friend.

These joygasmims could become a part of your life, not some faraway concept that’s nice for some but actually a tangible and regular part of your experience. 

When you’re sensing that something is missing in your life, that longing for joy and lightness to come back, turn towards your nervous system.

Learning how to regulate your system is the key to welcoming joy and gratitude back into your life. 

When your nervous system is in balance your mind isn’t preoccupied with potential threats meaning you can let your guard down and start to relax.

You can take in the sights and sounds around you and finally stop to smell the roses if you will. 

My journey towards regulation was a transformational one, driven by mindfulness, breathing practices, and movement exercises 🧘‍♂️.

As I gained the skills to observe my mind, understand overthinking’s purpose, and ultimately conquer it, I created space to feel the joy that stress had once stolen from me.

I felt alive and reconnected with the universe.

I want everyone to experience Joygasms. That’s why I have created my course ‘The Career Womans Guide to Overcoming Overthinking”.

Launching end of Novemeber, details coming soon. If you’re interested on going on the waitlist send me an email and I’ll add you on.